I know it’s been so… long since I last posted here. I went through a period of low motivation. I accomplished everything I wanted to accomplish in 2018 just to realize, I didn’t want any of it. I was stuck in a cycle of doing things that “seemed” right, and surrounding myself with people that “seemed” like they had my best interest at heart. Those things weren’t genuine, and I found myself in a place where I was silencing my intuition, my voice, and my creativity.
I am no longer in that place, and my fire is blazing again. Part of that fire requires me to call out and point out inequalities, not the ones inflicted on us by outsiders but inequality in our very own community. Specifically the silence that we receive from black men when it comes to our own unique challenges. I’ve talked about this time and time again, maybe most recently about Korryn Gaines. Black women/girls feel as though they have to be perfect victims in order to get support from our male counter parts, but that isn’t a prerequisite we hold them accountable for. Why is it the baseline for us?
When one of our brothers is murdered at the hands of police brutality, we take to the streets and demand justice by night fall. We have a sister die during labor far more often than the latter and there’s crickets. The excuses I’ve heard have been moreso along the lines of “those aren’t day to day conversations” or “that doesn’t affect both parties”. Birth happens everyday, if y’all want to have families birth is required. That’s it, that’s all.
So why am I petitioning for the support of folks that get our unconditional support? We are on the frontlines, organizations and movements literally built on our backs. But y’all cant see the significance of spreading the word about the importance of birth work in the black community.
Not only that but in exchange for your support you want intellectual labor. I have to provide you with references, articles, discussions, etc…. my intellectual labor is not free! My degree, my training, and my research were not free! So why storm in, minimize the experiences of black women, then add insult to injury by demanding that I also do the leg work.
This sounds a lot like white folks storming into conversations about racism and yelling “THATS NOT TRUE, WHERE’S THE PROOF!”. We all know that they don’t really care, so why would you waste time creating a bibliography for someone that doesn’t care about your plight. We all know the response is, “well what do you want us to do?”. Well damn I did the hard part! Is it too much to ask for you to figure that part out on your own?
Last but not least, the respectability politics. True allies are not waiting for a sugar coated message. If you’re truly about helping the cause, the presentation doesn’t matter. You’re hurt feelings don’t matter nearly as much as these black women literally dying while giving birth to an entire generation.
We have learned, that we are all we got. Black women must be prepared to protect other black women. We’re ok with that, but don’t get it confused with man hating. We’re simply pointing out the flaw in the system. We’re willing to go to war for you, but we’ll settle for a retweet or a repost in exchange. We all know reciprocity is entirely too much to ask though. So in 2019, I’m all about my sisters. I don’t have the energy to elicit help nor to do work for anyone that won’t reciprocate. That’s it, that’s all ✌🏾
Keyanna The Queen Mother 